


Only Half-Remembered

by Bazylia_de_Grean



Category: The Lord of the Rings Online
Genre: Gen, and one more shade but revealing the name would be a spoiler
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:47:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26455129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bazylia_de_Grean/pseuds/Bazylia_de_Grean
Summary: She watched, but did not interfere. Until one night the shade looked at her and pleaded: “Save me”. So she did.(spoilers forThe Black Book of Mordor: Interlude: Shades in the Swamp, and Chapters 11 and 12)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 5





	Only Half-Remembered

**Author's Note:**

  * For [serenbach86 (serenbach)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenbach/gifts).



Sometimes, he seems to be missing something, and she feels a pang of remorse. But it is short-lived. Last time someone was looking for him was the reason she brought him here, after all.

The isle of Tol Send is peaceful, a shining beacon of sweet-smelling flowers. A burial mound, wrapped in a shroud of soft, white petals. Even though there is no body; the water and its inhabitants took care of everything. But maybe that is why he found no rest in that symbolic, final resting place.

It was very different, when she found him there. Earth stained with blood, reeds and currents whispering, a body carried along the river, dragged down to the bottom. For a moment, it seemed he would follow it.

But he clung to that patch of land where his life ended. For a time, he remained there, lost, unsure, trying to remember what brought him here and why. She watched, but did not interfere. It was the best she could do. They only ever forgot the last moments when they were too painful to remember.

Then another ghost appeared, deeply troubled, looking for something. Scaring people away. Gultháva did not mind. The fields and the mere were not a place for the living.

Again, she only watched at first. The shade was pained, but she had seen it before, too. That was his punishment. Perhaps his atonement too. Either way, it was not up to her to meddle in his fate. That was up to him. It was always up to them. Their decisions and intentions, and how the Valar would judge them.

She saw them meet for the first time, passing each other by and freezing. They both fled, without understanding why. Without noticing her, as always.

She watched their paths cross again, as the second ghost kept seeking out the first one. Chasing him, without an explanation. There were only same meaningless worlds, repeated over and over. Still, she kept to herself.

Until one night the first shade looked at her with anguished eyes and pleaded: “Save me”. So she did.

* * *

He has a name. He does not remember, because names carry meaning, and he was spared that. But the river and the reeds and the winds whisper, and Gultháva knows. _Isildur_. Sometimes she says it, to remember when he cannot. She will keep his name for him, until her song erases it. It is not a heavy burden. Not for her.

But she will not say it when he is near. He lost his memories, and she will protect him from finding them. To his face, she simply calls him a friend.

It is not surprising he likes moonlight, with a name like his. Sometimes, on bright nights, they walk along the lake or across the fields. When the world is full of moon- and starlight and the restless shade hide. They walk, and she sings to him the water and the reeds and make music. Soft, soothing. It calms him, eases his fears.

This is all she wants. To give him peace, let him rest. Keep him safe from the world that hurt him so and the forgotten past that still haunts him.

In her secret home, she sings to him and he falls asleep. Never entirely free. But untroubled, if only for a while.

She watches as he sleeps. Eyes moving under closer eyelids. Thin, gossamer lines of insubstantial eyelashes. Hair, dark, like water when she runs her fingers through it. Dreams will not trouble him when she watches. She will keep his past at bay, as long as she sings.

Water is deep, fast, endless. It can drown all the worries and carry them away. His past will always be there. Mistakes, unfulfilled promises, all he left unfinished. But far enough not to pain him.

I will keep you safe, Isildur, she says, but never aloud. She will save him even from his name.


End file.
